


something different

by djhedy



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, Angst, Books, Dating, Established Relationship, Estranged Brothers, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, House Party, Kinda, M/M, Plants, andrew knows everyone and neil is new, andrew likes plants and books, anxious dates, bookstore, deep meaningful chats, he's that kind of guy, i mean i tagged nicky but is he even in the room, i mean it's mentioned in passing, insecure relationships, kindof, like a fluffy insecure bab, meeting the friends, ok im done, this is what we're talking about here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-09
Updated: 2019-12-09
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:15:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,287
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21725116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/djhedy/pseuds/djhedy
Summary: Neil curled his fingers round Andrew’s and let himself be tugged out of the car. He took a deep breath.Andrew tightened his grip on Neil’s and shut the door behind him. His eyes raked across his face. “Ready?”“Yeah,” said Neil, letting the breath out again. “Sure.”“Convincing,” said Andrew, pulling Neil behind him as they walked towards the house they’d parked in front of.---or, Neil's dating Andrew and wants to meet his friends. kind of
Relationships: Neil Josten/Andrew Minyard
Comments: 45
Kudos: 747





	something different

**Author's Note:**

> you know, slowly working your way through 3k of your wip is often followed immediately by a quick nonsense 7k one shot, right? yeh? i'm normal? cool

Neil curled his fingers round Andrew’s and let himself be tugged out of the car. He took a deep breath.

Andrew tightened his grip on Neil’s and shut the door behind him. His eyes raked across his face. “Ready?”

“Yeah,” said Neil, letting the breath out again. “Sure.”

“Convincing,” said Andrew, pulling Neil behind him as they walked towards the house they’d parked in front of. He didn’t let go of his hand until after he’d rung the doorbell, dropping Neil’s fingers and stuffing his hands nonchalantly in his pockets. Neil rubbed his fingertips into his cold palm.

The door opened to a tall, tanned man beaming at them. “Minyard,” said the voice, sunny and West-coast, “Glad you could make it.” West-coast held out his hand and after a pause Andrew pulled out his own to give it a quick shake. The man’s eyes darted over to Neil’s. “And who’s this?”

Neil blinked, hesitating. “Uh, I’m Neil,” he said.

“I’m Jeremy, nice to meet you,” West-coast beamed at him. He gestured behind him. “Sorry, come in,” and moved aside. Andrew walked past him, still having said nothing to him, and Neil followed.

He whispered to Andrew, “You didn’t tell them I was coming?” Andrew shrugged off his coat and hung it up in the hallway, as Jeremy bustled past.

“You want mulled wine?” he asked.

“Um,” said Neil.

“Yes,” said Andrew. “Thanks.”

Jeremy smiled at Andrew and kept walking.

Neil took his own coat off and hung it up on top of Andrew’s. Without looking at him he asked, “Do they even know who I am?”

“Don’t be stupid,” said Andrew, tugging Neil away from the coats.

“Well Jeremy didn’t recognise my name,” said Neil to his shoes.

“Jeremy isn’t my friend,” said Andrew, rubbing a thumb against Neil’s palm and frowning, like he could will understanding into him.

“Then what are you doing here?” Neil asked.

“Come,” Andrew said, a request, and Neil sighed. Andrew had to know Neil was nervous, that had to be why he was drawing little circles into his hand as they stepped through the hallway, but once again he dropped Neil’s hand before he pushed open the door, and Neil’s heart skipped a couple of beats.

The other side of the door was a large living room, two oversized beige sofas that looked comfier than Neil’s bed, blankets and throws and rugs in oranges, reds, purples, a cat in one corner and far too many bodies standing, sitting, looking at the open door.

“Andrew,” said a warm voice, and something tall stood up and made its way over. “You came.” The voice was flat, almost as flat as Andrew’s, but he was smiling. He had dark hair that sat straight and neat on top of his head, a dark mark under one of his eyes.

Andrew nodded at him. “Kevin,” he said, “Thanks for inviting us.”

Kevin looked at Neil, and his smile didn’t falter, but it grew a little too firm. “You must be Neil,” he said, and held out his hand.

Neil took in a heavy breath and shook Kevin’s hand. “Yeh, hi,” he said.

Kevin raised an eyebrow. “Chatty,” he said.

Andrew rolled his eyes and pushed Kevin away. “Just wait til you get him started on something.”

Kevin smirked at him. “I’ll look out for that. Did Jeremy let you in? Is he getting you a drink?”

Jeremy appeared with two steaming mugs and held them out. Andrew took them both and passed the second to Neil. Neil frowned at the concoction, giving it an experimental sniff. It was warm, at least, and he wrapped two hands around it. “Thanks,” he thought to say.

“No problem, Neil right?”

“Right.”

“Welcome to our home! You wanna tour?” Jeremy leaned up a bit to kiss the side of Kevin’s head before gesturing for them to follow after him. There were still a couple of curious glances in their direction, but Andrew followed after Jeremy without a word, and Neil rushed to follow. 

The other side of the living was the kitchen, white tiles on the floor and colourful photos on the walls, and two people stood in conversation. “The kitchen,” Jeremy announced proudly.

The two looked up, and the one who was dressed for a night out shook her head, long strawberry blonde hair with dark roots shaking round her, a small smirk on her mouth. “Minyard, you motherfucker, you never come to these things.”

Andrew didn’t respond, and the second of the two, shorter and with darker hair and a stockier build, a beat too late hit her head lightly. “Allison.” She gestured a little to Andrew’s side where Neil was clutching his mug for dear life. “She’s sorry,” she said, smiling at Neil.

No one spoke for a second and then Andrew said, “This is Neil.”

Neil looked at him a little exasperatedly then back to the two women. “Hi,” he said, a little pointlessly.

“Ooh,” said Allison, straightening. “A new victim.”

“ _Allison_ ,” said the other one, shaking her head at Neil. “She mostly doesn’t mean that. I’m Dan.”

Neil nodded. “Nice to meet you.”

“House tour?” Andrew said quickly, looking back to where Jeremy had been stood watching.

Jeremy quirked his lips. “And miss the warmth?” but he moved past Allison and Dan, leading them to a room with a washer-dryer and a bathroom and through to a big conservatory, one wall lined with glass windows and blinds to block out the night-time, with green and purple plants and two cosy deep armchairs and the walls lined with bookcases, and Neil stared at Andrew as Andrew stared at the room. Neil smirked.

Jeremy caught him and said, “What’s the joke?”

Neil shrugged, letting the smirk fall from his face as Andrew bent to read the label of one of the plants. “Oh, nothing,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck, “but I think Andrew’s probably a little jealous.”

“Jealously is a pointless emotion,” said Andrew, straightening again to read the spines of some of the books.

“He likes plants,” continued Neil, looking back at Jeremy, “and chairs. And nice places to sit while he looks at his plants and books.”

“It’s called reading,” said Andrew in a bored voice, not looking round.

“It’s called obsessive,” said Neil, feeling pleased when Jeremy laughed.

“Well, you’re welcome here any time,” Jeremy said, “a friend of Kevin’s and all that.” There was something odd in his voice, and Neil frowned a little.

After checking the upstairs – another bathroom, two bedrooms and an office with two desks next to each other, one with a gaming PC and two monitors and the other plain and uncluttered with a single macbook (something about the setup making Neil have to look away) – they returned downstairs, and when Neil sipped at his wine it was the perfect temperature. He wasn’t sure if he’d ever had mulled wine before, but it was rich and spicy and warm and rushed all the way to his fingertips.

“Mm.” Neil closed his eyes and took another sip. “This is delicious.”

He opened his eyes to a grinning Jeremy. “Please tell that to Kevin, will you? He’s convinced it doesn’t taste right without a shot of rum, but I’m a purist.”

Neil nodded, unsure which side of the debate he was supposed to take, and then Andrew was leaving his side and moving across the room to let a woman with cropped blond hair embrace him.

Neil frowned. Was he supposed to follow?

Jeremy watched Neil watch Andrew for a second and then turned to him and said, “So, Neil! Andrew’s pretty private. Are you guys, uh… you know.”

Neil raised an eyebrow at him. “Yeh,” he said shortly.

“Cool,” said Jeremy, grinning again. “Don’t get me wrong, you guys are pretty obvious, I just wanted to check – I don’t know Andrew very well but I’ve never heard of him dating anyone before.”

“Right,” said Neil, unsure what to say. He sipped at his mug again, and panickedly switched subjects. “So, when did you guys move in here?”

“A month ago,” said Jeremy, looking pleased to be asked. “We’ve been together a couple years now and Kevin wanted somewhere closer to the stadium.” He shrugged. “Just made sense,” like it was all practical, but Neil saw the warm look he sent Kevin across the room.

“Do you play Exy too?” Neil said, remembering what Andrew had told him about Kevin.

“Yeh,” said Jeremy, “It’s how we met actually. We signed up at the same time, three years ago.”

“This is a pretty modest house for two pros,” said Neil before he could catch himself.

Jeremy shrugged. “It’s more than we need, honestly,” he said, “and anyway, Kevin bought his parents a house, and I work a lot with the team’s foundation.” He shrugged. “We don’t really need a lot of money.

Neil found his mouth lifting a little, just at one edge, the desire to smile at someone he’d only just met quite rare for him. “Wow,” he said, “and I thought all Exy players were jerks.”

Jeremy raised an eyebrow, looking amused. “Who’s your point of reference?”

Neil gestured to Andrew across the room and Jeremy burst out laughing. “Interesting,” he said.

Neil smiled at him. “I can only imagine he was even more of a jerk when he was actually playing Exy in college.”

“Oh man,” said Jeremy, looking excited, “Kevin has some stories…” but he caught himself, looking a little worried. “Uh, actually, you know what, never mind. I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”

Neil sipped his drink. “I can’t be scared off that easily,” he said.

Jeremy gave him an appraising look. “Interesting,” he said again.

By the time Andrew had made his way back Neil had asked Jeremy all about his team, what it was like playing for the pros, and they had started on tactics, Neil remembering a few things from his days of high school Exy, wondering if there was anyone in the room who _wasn’t_ familiar with the sport, when Andrew interrupted with a gentle elbow at Neil’s side. “Neil,” he said, then gestured at the woman who’d followed him. “This is Renee.”

“Oh,” said Neil, feeling a little self-conscious suddenly, smile falling from his face. Renee’s hair wasn’t actually all blond, but had been dyed pastel shades at the bottom, and that paired with the beaming smile she was sending his way was enough to rock him a little off his feet.

“You’ve heard of me,” she said, amusement in her voice. “Well, I’m not the only one whose reputation precedes me. It’s nice to finally meet you Neil.” She held out her hand and Neil shook it, wondering just how many hands he was going to have to shake tonight.

“Hey, no fair,” said Jeremy, “how come she knew about this already?”

Andrew didn’t answer, instead draining the rest of his wine and settling the mug down on a table. Neil held his out to Andrew, only half empty and Andrew took it without question.

Renee smiled at Jeremy. “Sorry,” she said, “best friend rights.”

“I thought Kevin was Andrew’s best friend?”

“Don’t tell him,” said Renee with a glance over her shoulder, “he’ll be crushed.”

Neil’s fingers twitched at his sides, and Andrew moved a little closer to him, fingers wrapped round the cooling mug and drinking a little of Neil’s leftover wine.

Neil wanted a few things: to be elsewhere, for this to be easier, to be at home in his tiny crappy bedsit with his cat, to be in Andrew’s much nicer apartment two buildings away with _his_ cat.

He turned his head to ask Andrew, “Did I lock the front door?”

“Yes,” said Andrew, without looking at him.

“Are you just saying that, or did you actually see me do it?” Neil had images of Sir shooting through a crack and wandering through cold streets before finding a home with more heating, better cushions, a more reliable source of food.

“I actually saw you do it,” said Andrew, because he knew his lines, but the rehearsed tone made Neil frown. Glancing at his face Andrew rolled his eyes a little and finally took his hand, squeezing his palm with the tips of his fingers. Renee and Jeremy were talking off to the side and Andrew leaned in. “I saw you lock the door. I would not lie to you.”

Neil nodded and squeezed back and let Andrew’s hand drop away. “Ok.”

Sensing the exchange was over Jeremy looked back up. “Neil, can I get you anything else?”

“Um, just some water would be great honestly.”

“I’m on it,” said Jeremy before disappearing.

It would have been awkward, except Renee gave off an aura that said she didn’t recognise such an emotion. “Have you met Abby and David yet, Neil?”

“Um,” said Neil.

“Wymack,” said Andrew shortly.

“Oh,” said Neil, straightening a little. “Uh, no, not – yet.”

“They’re lovely people,” said Renee with a smile, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. “Honestly they’re a little like parents to us all, even after all this time.”

“Right,” said Neil. “How many of you were on the college team together?"

Renee turned her body to look around the room. “I don’t know who you’ve met, but Allison and Dan must be off somewhere…”

“In the kitchen,” supplied Andrew.

Renee pointed out a few people to Neil in turn, and he did his best to memorise names; Andrew wasn’t the most vocal when discussing the people in his life, and Neil had only heard about Renee and Kevin before tonight – he hadn’t even asked the name of Kevin’s boyfriend. “There are a few others here who weren’t on the team, but most of them have played Exy at one point,” she said, grinning at Neil. “I’m afraid you might be the odd one out.”

“Neil played in high school,” said Andrew, and Neil nodded, confirming, feeling a little stupid.

“Oh,” said Renee, looking genuinely pleased, “then you won’t be the odd one out!” Then she grinned, looking a little mischievous. “Was that on Andrew’s profile – seeking ex-Exy players.”

“No,” said Andrew, at the same time as Neil frowned and said, “We didn’t meet online.”

There was an awkward beat, the conversation even making Renee falter a little, before the smile was back and she said, “Oh.” She didn’t explain whether Andrew had lied, or she’d assumed, or – Neil wanted to disappear.

“Um, excuse me, bathroom,” Neil said, not looking at either of them as he turned and made his way through the kitchen as fast as he could, shutting the bathroom door behind him.

When he made his way back out he was blocked in the kitchen by Allison, who looked down at him with her arms folded. “So,” she said, “let’s get to know each other.”

Neil raised an eyebrow. “Ok,” he said. “Allison, right?”

“Don’t you forget it,” she said, smile razor-sharp. “Jeremy said to give you this,” and she held out a glass to Neil.

Neil took one look at it, then back up to her face. “I asked for water.”

“This is water,” she said, sounding too innocent. Pathetic. Neil wondered where Dan had gone. 

“Aren’t we a little old for this?” he said, trying to smile, wondering if it came out a little crazy, trying to smooth it away only a moment later.

Allison watched the curious gesture and then set the glass on the table. “Alright, whatever,” she said, “party poop,” turning away and leaving the room altogether.

Neil upturned the glass in the sink, smelling the vodka, and got down a new glass, filling it with water, and leaning against a counter.

He stood there for a few minutes, feeling useless and itchy and wondering if Sir was ok.

Andrew appeared in the doorway, one hand on each frame. He said, “There you are.”

Neil smiled at him.

“Hiding?” Andrew let go and walked forwards.

“Of course,” said Neil, pleased when Andrew walked all the way up to him, taking the glass out of his hand and setting in on the counter, running one hand over his shoulder to settle on the back of his neck.

“Come on,” said Andrew.

“I don’t know any of them,” protested Neil.

“Hence the point of tonight.” Andrew’s eyes bore into Neil’s.

Neil sighed. “None of them even know who I am.”

Andrew pushed his hand up into Neil’s hair and tugged a little. “Renee does. Kevin does.”

“I don’t know why you want me here.”

Andrew tugged again. “You do. Stop it.” So Neil closed his eyes and leaned a little towards Andrew, and Andrew rested his forehead against Neil’s, and Neil took in a deep breath. Andrew allowed this for a few seconds before stepping away. “Come on,” he said again, turning to move away, and Neil followed him.

Back in the living room Andrew moved to sit on one of the sofas next to Kevin. He sat in the middle, deliberately leaving room for Neil at the other end, so Neil took it cautiously, leaving a little room between the two of them, but the second Neil had sat down Andrew shuffled away from Kevin, against Neil, pressing their legs together. Neil smiled at him.

Kevin and Andrew were talking about work, and Neil was half listening to Kevin ranting about his team’s new coach, when someone said his name. “Mm?” Neil turned round to see another huge guy – why were all of Andrew’s friends enormous – leaning forward in his chair and grinning.

“Neil, right?”

“Yeh,” said Neil, hoping he didn’t have to shake another hand. He waved, feeling a little foolish.

The guy laughed, and waved back. “I’m Matt, nice to meet you.” Neil just nodded. “So, you’re with Andrew right?” Neil nodded again. “Cool, that’s cool man, we’ve all known Andrew forever, and I’ve never met anyone before.” Matt looked a little worried. “Not that that’s a bad thing – or a good thing –”

Matt’s boundless energy made Neil feel settled, and he smirked, “It’s ok, you haven’t said anything bad.”

“Good,” said Matt, darting his eyes at Andrew and back again. “Not that I’m terrified of your boyfriend or anything,” he said, leaning even closer, “but he’s a bit fucking terrifying.”

Neil shrugged. “Not really. He’s a pussycat.”

Matt had taken a moment to down some of his drink, and some of it came back up as he spluttered into his glass, someone at his side actually patting him on the back, delicate little pats that surely did nothing to this guy’s massive frame – and Matt took some time clearing his throat. “Christ,” he said. Neil said nothing, looking around the room while Matt gathered himself back up. “Well,” said Matt again, and Neil met his eyes. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard someone call Andrew that before.”

“What,” said Andrew, hearing his name and turning round.

“I’m spilling all your secrets,” said Neil, leaning back against the sofa and feeling pleased to be getting Andrew’s attention again.

“Which ones,” said Andrew, frowning at Matt.

“Apparently you’re a pussycat,” said Matt, grinning.

Andrew actually covered his face with his hand, shaking his head, and said, “Neil.”

“What?” said Neil, enjoying himself. “You don’t want your friends to know what a softie you are?”

“ _We_ want to know,” said Matt.

“Matt isn’t my friend,” said Andrew from beneath his hand.

“Give it up man it’s been seven years,” said Matt, not looking at all phased by the insult. “Go on, Neil.”

“Mm,” said Neil, looking at Andrew quickly, but with his face covered it was hard to get consent. He tugged Andrew’s hand away so he had to look at him, and said, “What shall I tell them?”

Neil wasn’t sure whether Matt’s laughter was caused by the genuineness of the question or by the lightness of the blush that appeared on the tips of Andrew’s cheekbones. “You’re ridiculous,” Andrew muttered, kissing him on the cheek, and Neil felt himself light up. “Say whatever you like, they’ll know it’s slander,” but he grabbed Neil’s hand before turning back to Kevin and the small group that had gathered around him, and didn’t let go.

“I can see it already,” said Matt when Neil turned back to him.

“What?”

“Pussycat,” said Matt, “when you’re around, I can totally believe it.”

Neil smiled, expecting Matt to ask more about Andrew, but instead he asked Neil about his job, his hobbies, where he lived, where he’d gone to school, did he want to stay in his job forever. It made Neil uncomfortable, and he answered each question as shortly as possible, increasing his grip a little on Andrew’s hand, and perhaps Matt had noticed the change in Neil’s demeanour, because after he returned from topping up their drinks – beer for him, water for Neil – he asked, “So how long have you and Andrew been together?”

Neil tried to work it out. “Oh, I don’t know,” he said, glancing at Andrew, but Andrew was listening to someone Neil hadn’t been introduced to, gesturing expansively at an irritated Kevin, so Neil looked back at Matt and said, “A couple of months, I guess.”

Matt smiled encouragingly. “Where did you guys meet?”

“The bookstore where I work,” said Neil.

Matt frowned. “I thought you said you worked at a charity, doing their finances?”

“Oh, yeah,” said Neil, “but that’s only four days a week, I work at the bookstore on weekends and evenings.” Matt raised his eyebrows so Neil fingered the hem of his jeans and looked away. “I’m saving up,” he said vaguely.

Matt dropped it. “Ok, cool man,” and smiled again. “So, you like books?”

Neil shrugged. “Not really. I know the owners, I moved in next door when – after – when I first moved to the city, I’ve been working there for a few years.”

“Cool,” said Matt again.

“Um, but Andrew likes books.”

“Interesting,” said Matt, grinning as if Neil was a master storyteller.

“Yeah, he started coming in a few months ago – wanted to know if we had a copy of _A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man,_ and when I asked who the author was berated me for bad taste.”

Matt’s grin slipped a little. “Mm,” he said, “the start of all great romances.”

“I told him to go fuck himself,” Neil said, smiling fondly at the memory.

“Right,” said Matt.

“He came back every Saturday.” Neil ran his finger along the inside of Andrew’s palm. “Tried to recommend books to me, was pretty horrified when I told him I didn’t read. He even found a copy of that book he likes and showed it to me, bought me a copy and shoved it in my bag. I told him where he could shove it but…” Neil shrugged.

“Mm,” Matt said, nodding as though this story made sense. “And now…” he gestured between the two of them.

Neil shrugged. “Why not? Nothing better to do.”

Matt frowned and Neil tugged a little at Andrew’s hand. Andrew turned round with a curious expression. “Cigarette?”

Andrew nodded and pulled Neil to his feet, but on the way out they were stopped by a slightly nervous looking Renee. “Andrew,” she said, “please remember this is a house warming party for Kevin and Jeremy, and we’re here to support them, and not to… maim people.”

Neil looked sideways at Andrew, whose expression hadn’t changed, but then he hadn’t expected it to. “Renee,” said Andrew tightly.

“Nicky’s here,” Renee said with a small sigh. “He brought Aaron.” Neil had no idea who she was talking about, but Andrew’s entire body tensed up, and Neil stepped away from where their bodies had been touching. Renee flicked a look at him at the movement, but she was entirely focused on Andrew. “Andrew,” she said, “What do you want to do?”

Andrew gave her a bored look. “We’re going for a cigarette, Aaron can do whatever he likes.” He changed direction, and led Neil to the back of the house instead. They pushed through the back door of the kitchen and leaned against the porch railing. Neil watched as Andrew lit two cigarettes and passed one over to Neil.

Neil took a couple of slow drags before asking, “Who’s Aaron?”

Andrew let out a long, heavy sigh, and Neil watched tendrils of smoke disappear into the air. It was another minute before Andrew said, “My brother.”

Neil froze, turned back to Andrew, tilted his head. “Wait. _Brother?_ ”

Andrew darted a look at Neil, and straightened. “Yes.”

Neil frowned. “Oh. I didn’t know – you have a brother? In the city?”

Andrew didn’t say anything, and Neil looked away. He took another drag on his cigarette, irritation irrationally flooding his body. “Ok,” he said curtly, and took a break from actually smoking, watching instead as smoke curled around him in the cold December air.

“I didn’t know he was coming.”

“Clearly.” Neil took another drag – he never usually actually smoked the things this much, mostly he just craved the way the smoke reminded him of – but his fingers felt twitchy. He held the cigarette between his lips again.

“We’re not close,” Andrew said, the admission sounding like it had been sucked through closed teeth.

“You don’t have to tell me anything,” Neil said, knowing he sounded childish and not caring.

“Don’t –” said Andrew, aborting a sentence half way through. “I didn’t know he was coming.”

Neil ground out his cigarette against the railing, and turned to find a plant pot with half-finished cigarettes inside. He threw his filter in and said. “It’s fine. Do you need to go see him?”

Andrew was waiting for Neil to look at him, but Neil didn’t, and eventually Andrew headed back inside anyway.

In the living room everything was basically the same except there was a replica of Andrew standing in the middle of the room, shaking Kevin’s hand.

Neil felt his eyes widen, and for want of something cooler to do he put his hands in his pockets, feeling a little unsteady, and sought out Jeremy, who looked uncertain and fiddly at the edge of the group. Most of the small groups were still talking, but eyes were on Aaron.

“Glad you came,” said Kevin quietly.

“Are you,” drawled Andrew at Neil’s side.

Aaron’s eyes flashed over to him, and then to Neil. He felt himself being assessed, Aaron’s eyes raking him up and down, looking unimpressed, before locking back onto Andrew. “Great to see you too,” he said, contempt and sarcasm dripping from his voice. Neil disliked him instantly.

Andrew grabbed Neil’s upper arm, actually grabbed it, and steered him round the room to the window seat at the back, where Jeremy was in conversation with another man. Andrew sat Neil down, and Neil glared at him for the manhandling. “What’s your damage?” Neil asked, annoyed, rubbing his arm.

But Andrew wasn’t looking at him. He wasn’t looking at anything, he was glaring past all of them, eyes focused and tight on the wall.

Jeremy looked a little worried, and then remembered his friend, “Oh, Neil, this is Jean,” he said, a little helplessly, gesturing to his side.

Neil wasn’t in the mood for anymore handshakes. “Hi,” he said, feeling a little shitty, “and I suppose you’re Andrew’s uncle?”

Andrew huffed, the only sign he was present, and Jean frowned. “No,” he said, his accent a little thick, “I would not be old enough.”

“Don’t mind Jean,” said Jeremy, patting his arm, “he doesn’t have a sense of humour.”

Jean scowled at him, but Jeremy ignored this. “I’m guessing you didn’t know about Aaron.”

Neil shook his head at the same time as Andrew said, “Jeremy, don’t.”

“Don’t what?” said Neil, looking up at where he was still standing.

Andrew's body tightened, and then he turned and just walked away. A moment later they heard the front door slamming shut. No one else in the room had really noticed, except Renee whose eyes had been tracking Andrew the second they’d come back inside. She glanced at Neil, and then left too, and they heard the door shut a second time.

And now Neil was definitely _pissed_. He wished he had a glass to clench, something to kick, a front door to slam. He glared at his knees. What was he supposed to do now, _leave?_ Stay where he was abandoned in a room of Andrew’s friends and old teammates, estranged brother, god knows who else? An ex-boyfriend for all Neil knew?

“Well,” said Jeremy at his side. “I feel like I should apologise for Andrew’s behaviour, but to be honest you probably know him better than I do.”

“We only met a few months ago,” Neil said.

“Oh,” said Jeremy, and Neil could feel him and Jean exchanging glances at Neil’s side. “He’ll come back. If there’s one thing I’ve learned about Andrew from Kevin, it’s that he doesn’t abandon people.” Neil looked up at Jeremy and gestured at the empty space in front of them. Jeremy shrugged, smiling a little. “You know… in the big picture.”

“Right,” said Neil. He turned to Jean, and said abruptly, “Tell me your life story.”

Jean blinked a little, and then opened his mouth, and Neil just about understood his accent, and that he was a backliner on the team with Kevin and Jeremy, and it didn’t escape Neil how close the two were sitting together, and he didn’t care enough to ask, but he did wonder where Kevin was, when suddenly Kevin and Aaron were stood in front of him.

Neil blinked up at them, Aaron not that much taller standing in front of him with his arms crossed, Kevin towering over them. “Aaron,” Kevin said, not looking at Neil, “leave it.”

“Who the fuck are you then?” Aaron said.

Neil blinked, and then smiled. “Neil.”

Aaron clenched his teeth. “What are you doing here with him?”

Neil tilted his head to the side. “I think you’re trying to get at something here, Aaron, but you’re going to have to be more specific.”

“Oh god,” said Jeremy weakly at his side, glancing between Kevin and Aaron. “Jean, go get Andrew.”

Jean left a little hurriedly, and Kevin tugged on Aaron’s sleeve but he shrugged him off. “I want to know who the fuck you are.”

Neil stood slowly, pleased to have a couple of inches on this asshole. “Ok. I’m Neil, Andrew brought me here. He likes books. I work in a bookstore. It’s your classic guy-meets-guy. I’m not sure what you want to know?”

“I don’t like strangers,” said Aaron, straightening as much as he could, as if that was supposed to scare Neil. “What are you doing with Andrew?”

Lots of things did scare Neil: a room full of strangers, intimacy, the idea of his cat getting hurt, anxiety about leaving his door open, his oven on, losing his keys, the truth.

This asshole did not.

“You know he’s never mentioned you, right?” said Neil instead of answering Aaron’s question. “Why’s that I wonder?”

Aaron started forward but then Andrew was in the room, pushing him away, and Aaron was throwing a punch but Andrew darted away from it and Neil hesitated, surprise blocking his instincts, but it was a good thing really because it was over quickly, Jean was standing between them in a second, Kevin hauling Aaron away and Renee placing a gentle hand on Andrew’s shoulder before anyone could make contact.

Jeremy came up to Aaron and said, in a pained voice, “Aaron, come on man. You know you’re welcome here, no one’s picking sides, but not if you’re gonna fight.”

Aaron glared at him and shrugged Kevin off, but he just stalked away, pushing Matt at the shoulder until Matt heaved himself to his feet and followed Aaron into the kitchen.

Renee was talking to Andrew in a low voice, Andrew’s eyes on the floor but clearly listening intently, and Neil had finally had enough.

He stalked into the hallway and grabbed his coat, and Jeremy followed with wide eyes. “Neil, man, don’t go –”

“It was nice to meet you, Jeremy,” said Neil, meaning it, and he opened the door and slammed it behind him.

It was a cold fucking night and he had no idea where he was, but he stormed past Andrew’s car and picked a direction at random. He took his phone out his coat pocket but of course it had run out of battery. He shoved it back in and folded his arms, pulling the coat tightly around him. He’d walk until he hit a landmark. A store, a sign, whatever. He’d rather walk all night than go back.

It only took a minute for Andrew to catch up, and when Neil turned his head at Andrew’s touch to his arm he was panting. “Where the fuck are you even going?”

Neil turned back and kept walking, but didn’t answer.

“ _Neil_.”

“I’m going home, Andrew.”

“You’re really not.”

Neil stopped and turned to glare at him. “I’m not in the mood.”

“For what, navigational advice?”

Neil looked away, and the anger was fading to something else – he didn’t know – he felt – it was awful, everything inside was so awful. As nervous as he was part of him had been looking forward to meeting Andrew’s friends; the last few months had been surprising and exciting and he’d felt lit up from the inside with the knowledge of _Andrew_ , but now he just felt drained and unhappy and unsure.

“I’m going home, Andrew,” he said to the ground.

After a minute Andrew sighed. “Let me drive you.”

When Neil didn’t say anything Andrew turned, hesitant. Neil glared at Andrew’s feet and followed him back to the car.

Neil shut the car door and buckled his seatbelt, feeling smaller by the second, crossing his arms and looking down at his lap. He wished he could disappear.

Andrew just drove for a few minutes, letting tense silence hang in the air. Once they were out of the neighbourhood and onto a main road he shuffled a little in his seat and said, “Neil. I’m sorry.”

Neil raised his head to stare out the windscreen. He shrugged, not knowing how to respond. “It’s fine,” he heard himself saying.

“Don’t,” said Andrew, sounding angry.

“Well, what do you want me to say?”

“It isn’t fine.”

“Ok.”

“Look, can you just –” Andrew stopped, took in a deep, steadying breath. “I wanted you there, ok?”

Neil never knew how Andrew saw through all the layers he delicately built to hold people back, but at those words Neil felt his eyes grow a little wet. He turned his head to face out the side window. This was ridiculous. This was why he didn’t do _this_. It turned you fucking soft. It was like his mother had always said.

“ _Neil._ ”

“Ok.”

“Don’t say that unless you believe me.”

“Alright,” said Neil, sinking a little against his seat, feeling the tears disappear and his walls going up. “I don’t believe you.” Even to his own ears his voice sounded cold and distant, and this at least he knew how to do.

“Don’t fucking do that.”

“You’re very bossy tonight.”

Andrew swerved and Neil threw up a hand instinctively to grab at the door. Andrew pulled into a 24-hr Walmart and parked his car as far away from the store as possible, a distant streetlight lighting up the side of his face. He turned the car off and turned in his seat, probably glaring at Neil, but Neil was still staring out the windshield.

“I didn’t know Aaron was going to be there –”

“You’ve said that.”

“Because I haven’t spoken to him in three years.”

That, finally, broke Neil’s composure a little. He turned his head to frown at Andrew. “Really?”

Andrew nodded once, short.

Neil thought of what to ask, wondered if this changed why he was mad, was losing a grip on why he was mad in the first place. Curiosity won out and he said, “But he knows all your friends?”

Andrew looked like he found this whole conversation painful, but he said, “We went to the same college. He played Exy. Nicky too. Nicky’s my cousin.”

Neil nodded at that, “The one you lived with?” Andrew nodded. Neil felt tired all of a sudden, and sunk further into his seat, resting the side of his face against the headrest. “Ok.”

“I didn’t – I didn’t want to tell you about him.”

Neil frowned. “I guess I get that.”

“I would have. If I’d known he was going to be there.”

“How have you avoided him all these years?”

Andrew’s face was blank, but his eyes were anything but, darting at Neil and away again. “We usually manage. When we see each other we don’t talk. I think seeing you set him off.”

“Homophobe?” guessed Neil.

Andrew nodded but said, “General asshole, really.”

“I wonder what he’d say about you.”

Andrew caught his eye. “Same. Maybe.”

“Shocking.” Neil felt himself smiling a little so he looked away.

“I’m sorry,” said Andrew again, and something about the repeat of the apology made Neil feel a little warm.

His eyes felt warm too and he said, in a quiet voice, “I though you would have told them about me.”

“I did,” said Andrew, voice insistent, like he was desperate to reach out and make Neil face him, and was holding himself back. “I told you I don’t – I don’t have many people I’m close to. I told Kevin and Renee. I told the people who mattered. The others…” he trailed off.

Neil felt small and stupid and like he was being dramatic for no reason, but he closed his eyes and said, “Ok.”

“ _Don’t_ ,” Andrew said again. “Don’t do that. I get why you’re upset –”

“I’m not upset.”

“…Ok.”

They sat in silence for a few minutes, Andrew turning away and back again, Neil gaining control over his emotions. “It’s fine,” he said eventually, and when Andrew started to speak he looked at him and shook his head. “It’s really fine. I’m probably being stupid. I guess I thought –” He turned back and straightened in his seat, and shook his head. “I just thought something different that’s all. Can you take me home?”

After a second Andrew turned the engine back on, and they rode the last ten minutes back to Neil’s apartment in silence. They lived on the same block, but Andrew parked outside Neil’s building, turning the engine off and making no move to leave the car.

Neil cleared his throat. “I guess – I’ll see you.”

“What did you mean,” Andrew interrupted him, this time the one to stare out the windscreen and not meet his eyes.

“When?”

Andrew pressed his lips together. “Something different.”

Neil looked away, feeling hot and embarrassed, but if he didn’t say it now – “I don’t know Andrew, you made me feel like complete crap tonight. You didn’t tell them who I was, Jeremy didn’t know I was even coming, you clearly think the world of Renee and you two have this history I couldn’t begin to compete with and don’t know anything about because you haven’t told me anything. You didn’t tell me you had a brother, I didn’t even get to meet your cousin. I thought we –” He shook his head and opened the car door and pulled himself out the car, shutting it behind him. He was half way to his door when he realised Andrew had followed him.

Andrew pushed ahead of Neil and leaned back against his door before Neil could get the key in it. Neil huffed and turned away.

“Thought we what,” said Andrew quietly. Neil folded his arms, irritated and small and he felt so stupid.

“This is why I don’t fucking do this,” said Neil tightly, to no one in particular. Andrew tugged at his coat sleeve once, a request for more, and Neil bit out, “Because I don’t know how to do this, Andrew. I really fucking like you ok, and I thought you liked me, and I thought we were _something_.”

“We are,” said Andrew in a small voice, the quietest Neil had ever heard him.

Neil looked back at him, small and solid against his peeling front door.

Andrew swallowed, and whispered, “We are,” and tugged Neil’s sleeve again. Neil dropped his arms slowly. Andrew’s eyes bore into his. “We are,” he said again, pulling Neil forward by his arm. Neil felt himself go, Andrew’s face cold and pale, blond hair curling round his ears and fluffy white hood curling against his neck. Neil was a second from Andrew, and Andrew breathed against his face, “We are,” a little more sure than before, and placed the gentlest kiss on Neil’s lips.

Neil felt his eyes close. He didn’t think Andrew had ever kissed him that gently before. He brought a cold hand to Neil’s cheek, and Neil shuddered a little under his touch.

Neil sighed against Andrew, kissed him back, a little annoyed for some reason, moved to rest his head against the side of Andrew’s, felt Andrew’s hands gathering round his waist. “I’m still annoyed,” Neil said.

“Ok,” said Andrew.

“You’re in the wrong here, I’m sure of it,” said Neil against Andrew’s ear. He kissed it, to make sure Andrew got the message.

“I agree,” said Andrew, squeezing his hips through his thick coat.

“I was looking forward to meeting them all.”

“Liar.” Andrew nuzzled the side of his face.

“Ok, I wasn’t, but I was looking forward to hearing terrible stories about you.”

Andrew pulled away. “Maybe I was a saint in college, and you’re the one who turned me.”

Neil smiled a little at him. “Hey, I’m the one who’s been tainted here, who introduced who to Oscar Wilde?”

Andrew huffed, pulling a piece of Neil’s hair round his ear. “Don’t pretend you’ve read it.”

“Not yet,” said Neil, feeling a little better. He smiled against Andrew’s cheek and kissed the side of his mouth. “I enjoyed horrifying Matt.”

“He’s easily horrifiable.”

“I don’t think that’s a word.”

“What did you tell him?” Andrew shoved Neil away a little and grabbed his key from his hand.

“He asked how we met.”

“Ah,” said Andrew, unlocking the front door and shoving Neil through it.

“I don’t think he thinks glaring at each other in a bookstore is worthy of great romance.”

“What does he know,” said Andrew, placing his hand at the small of Neil’s back and pushing him up the stairs.

“Why does Renee think we met on a dating app?” asked Neil once they were outside his apartment door and Andrew was unlocking it, one hand back on Neil’s hip and pushing him inside.

“Less embarrassing.” Andrew shoved the door shut behind him and shrugged his coat off, leaving it on the floor and pushing his hands inside Neil’s coat.

“Less embarrassing? Than wooing me in my place of work?” Andrew removed Neil’s coat and pulled him towards his bedroom, not bothering to turn on any lights. Neil heard a plaintive meow from across the room and Andrew stopped with a heavy sigh. He turned on the light nearest the kitchen end of the main room and Neil bent to stroke a hand through Sir’s soft grey fur while Andrew got down the cat food.

“Meeting you at all is the embarrassing part,” said Andrew once Sir’s cat bowl was full and the light was back off and there was nothing else to get in his way.

In the bedroom Neil said, “What a shame for you.”

And Andrew said, “Yes,” against his lips, and kissed him into the mattress.

**Author's Note:**

> i dunno, i watched that episode of parks and rec where diane is upset that lesley knows ron better than she does, and i was listening to "we found love" by rhianna, and, apparently this fic is the bastard child of those two pieces of art. ART, man. that's what we're seeing here.  
> xxx
> 
> edited to add: i've changed this to be listed as a series because a) people have been so nice about this au it makes me want to write more... b) i can think of two obvious follow-ups to this, how they met at the bookstore (series title is a quote from 'portrait of the artist') and settling better into their relationship. if you have any other requests, or what pov you think bookstore should be from, let me know :). subscribe to the series link if you like. -hedy x


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